inspiration photos

I think Kristen had a very poignant blog post the other day about inspiration photos.

I used to love taking pictures of myself or as part of a group. I acknowledged I was heavier but I always did my best to look less-fat in pictures than I really was. - Like turning to the side was really fooling anyone. -

I took tons of pictures of my HUGE pregnant self. I didn't care that I was almost 400lbs. I was pregnant and I wanted pictures. Check out this one a few days before Aidan made his arrival. I was so swollen I could hardly see! That is a 5X gown that I bought about 2 months before I gave birth. I had grown out of my regular 3X and was worried that a 4X wouldn't make it all the way through. I still wear them even though they are too big now.

That was almost a year ago now. They will be one of the first things to go!

But after the birth of my son, I saw this picture of me at my return to work/post-baby shower and I have avoided the camera ever since.

I actually cried about it a couple of times when I would see pictures of people with their infant children. My son would have no record of the two of us together during his first year of life because I simply refused to be infront of the camera. I hate my post-partem body, the last 30lbs of baby weight that I can't get rid of, the horrible scar from my emergency c-section, and the large flap of skin/fat left over from gaining almost 100lbs.



But to speak to the positive side ... I also have a picture of myself from about 10 years ago. I was the skinnest I had been in a few years and I looked amazing. Though at the time I probably thought I was huge - little did I know the weight/size yet to come! When I decided to have WLS I put that picture on my dresser along with one of my son. They remind me even when I am frustrated, can't find something to wear, sweaty from simply getting dressed, that change is coming. And now only 3 days left!

liquid courage

I know you have them, in fact you probably have them right there on that computer. I'm talking about those soup recipes that helped you through multiple weeks of clear and creamy liquids.

I've never made soup before unless you count - open can, add water, stir. But I am ready to chop, boil, and puree, I just need to your recipes. I thought about just using recipes off the web but I don't want to spend all that time in preparation to only be disappointed in the end.

I'm trusting you my blog buddies - send me in the right direction!

pre-op visit at the hospital

Even though I am still stick with bronchitis the doc says to go ahead and do my pre-op visit at the hospital today. I'm not sure what tests they will be running but I am ready.

Surgery is scheduled for Friday and if all goes well I will be done by 10am.

Can't believe I am so close!

Bariatric Specialists of North Carolina

My docotor just updated his website. Thought I would give him a mention.

Bariatric Surgery, Weight Loss Surgery, Lap band in Raleigh - Bariatric Specialists of North Carolina

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liquid preparation

Lately, every time my husband and I got to Wal-Mart I look through the protein/meal replacement/breakfast shakes they have spread throughout the pharmacy section. Yet, instead of purchasing some to try out before surgery, I leave empty handed. Billy keeps telling me - you need to try something now so we can stock up before hand. But I just can't seem to spend the money on them when I'm not even sure I will like them.

I drank chocolate Slim-fast a lonnnnnnnnnng time ago when it was in the little metal can and it was ok. But there are so many different brands and flavors now. Where do I even begin? What types of shakes/drinks to you ladies enjoy and where do you get them? Do I need to purchase them from GNC or my doctor - or will Wal-mart suffice?

Help!