Weight Loss Tracker

Monday, September 28, 2009

inspiration photos

I think Kristen had a very poignant blog post the other day about inspiration photos.

I used to love taking pictures of myself or as part of a group. I acknowledged I was heavier but I always did my best to look less-fat in pictures than I really was. - Like turning to the side was really fooling anyone. -

I took tons of pictures of my HUGE pregnant self. I didn't care that I was almost 400lbs. I was pregnant and I wanted pictures. Check out this one a few days before Aidan made his arrival. I was so swollen I could hardly see! That is a 5X gown that I bought about 2 months before I gave birth. I had grown out of my regular 3X and was worried that a 4X wouldn't make it all the way through. I still wear them even though they are too big now.

That was almost a year ago now. They will be one of the first things to go!

But after the birth of my son, I saw this picture of me at my return to work/post-baby shower and I have avoided the camera ever since.

I actually cried about it a couple of times when I would see pictures of people with their infant children. My son would have no record of the two of us together during his first year of life because I simply refused to be infront of the camera. I hate my post-partem body, the last 30lbs of baby weight that I can't get rid of, the horrible scar from my emergency c-section, and the large flap of skin/fat left over from gaining almost 100lbs.

But to speak to the positive side ... I also have a picture of myself from about 10 years ago. I was the skinnest I had been in a few years and I looked amazing. Though at the time I probably thought I was huge - little did I know the weight/size yet to come! When I decided to have WLS I put that picture on my dresser along with one of my son. They remind me even when I am frustrated, can't find something to wear, sweaty from simply getting dressed, that change is coming. And now only 3 days left!


  1. I bet you're so excited that your surgery is so close! I am hoping to get banded next month. I just finished reading through your whole blog and really enjoyed it. I also had a difficult pregnancy (I also got gestational diabetes, high blood pressure, pre eclampsia, bedrest, etc. etc.) and I had to laugh at your "Motherly Advice" post...your mom totally sounds like my mom! Anyway, I look forward to reading about your journey and sharing along the way.

  2. I just found your blog and will follow your success journey. I was just banded on 9/11 and wish you best of luck for your surgery.

  3. Those maternity gowns will be a thing of the past in no time. Almost there!

  4. Good things ahead! Think how exciting it will be to dump those x sizes and get thinner. We are all behind you here cheering you on. Not long now!! WHOO..

  5. Excited to watch your progress! Thinner, healthier days ahead!

  6. Hey I'm glad u posted the before pics. I see an adorable gal in them but I understand that seeing them for you produces mixed feelings.

    I've *only* lost 40 lbs but I'll tell you, comparing pics is a lot of fun because you can study them and they inspire you.

    Friday is coming so quickly for you. I am excited for you. We're here for you!